Black Friday (AKA The day after)

The pilgrimage to seasonal frenzied commercialism is a pop culture phenomenon, one that I can happily do without. Mrs. Troll and I went as observers, and in that role, had a great time watching ladies run over each other in their mad dash to be the first to purchase last years trendy, must have, gadget.

I can’t believe that we were actually there with the ‘Black Friday’ crowd. These people were lined up for about one half mile in each direction just to get ‘SPECIAL’ deals on cheap things. (Who in hell needs five portable DVD players? Or five computers?)

When the doors opened at ‘Wally World’ people were literally running to keep place in line. Mrs. Troll and I simply sauntered up and slid in the door, making the idea of waiting in line for hours simply laughable. (And incidentally pissing off anyone who noticed that we were line jumping.) Once in the door, the fights began. There was more than one altercation in just the first five minutes. We were in and out in less than thirty minutes, including a dispute at checkout over the correct price on a toy. (Mrs. Troll won.) Pissing off all the others that were in line behind us. (We were evidently keeping them from an important appointment at 5:30 in the morning.)

Frankly, I just don’t get it. To stand in the cold for hours to save perhaps one hundred dollars seems like more of a social event than bargain shopping. I think that if people were to shop smarter they would not need to stand in the cold for hours. But what am I saying? Shopping smarter requires thinking!

It was a good time for the observer, a bad time for the serious shopper. We refused to take the whole thing seriously, seeing as how Mrs. Troll (A contender for the shopping championships.) had all of her shopping done over a month ago. We had the option of just walking out with nothing and not feeling like we had failed.

That’s an example of smart shopping, do it before the deadline and take your time, picking and choosing purchases with forethought.

For those of you that participated in this years frenzy; I hope that you got exactly what you wanted and escaped without injury. I thank you for the entertainment. I also hope that you learned something and avoid doing it again like you would avoid sex with a porcupine.