What God wants...

Over the years, I have heard many people ‘justify’ what they are doing (and telling others to do) by saying, “its God’s will,” or something very similar.

Wars have been fought for this reason, but who exactly is it that decides what God wants? Is it religious leaders, politicians, or just your average Joe with a day job and a mortgage? God doesn’t seem to be talking too much these days. When I ask His opinion, I get nothing.

I don’t think I have ever done anything and said it was God’s will. I probably could have. I think I’m just crazy enough to pull it off.

Me, “But officer, it’s OK! God told me to rob that bank!”
Cop, “You’re crazy.”
Me, “Yep! Thanks for noticing! Can I go now?”

Certain TV evangelists will tell you that God is punishing America for something or another by hurricanes and other natural disasters. Then the PR people that they pay large amounts of money to keep their butts out of hot water say that they have made themselves look like assholes again and tell them to publicly apologize.

Overseas, certain religious leaders tell people that God says it’s a good thing to kill the infidels and make their way of life the standard for the whole world. They are obviously assholes.

In each case, they seem to be telling us that God is on their side and no other. In each case, I think that they are acting like assholes.

Therefore, I feel that I can safely say, with all my Trollish wisdom, that God must want you to be an asshole.




I am in no way assuming responsibility in any way. If you get into trouble, on your head be it. If you are crazy enough to actually take this shit seriously, then you are crazy.